Celebrating you and your journey this Mother's Day.

We're joined by Clare Keys from The Womb Rooms , registered and endorsed midwife and International Board Certified Lactation Consultant (IBCLC) based on Australia's Gold Coast.  Through her practice, The Womb Rooms, she provides personalized antenatal preparation, postpartum care, and lactation support.

Clare specializes in the transition into motherhood (matrescence), empowering parents through the physical, psychological, and emotional changes of the postpartum period.
 

Women to Mother ~ the process.

 
Put simply… everything changes. We are finally starting to talk about it more.

This process now commonly called Matrescence, is the transition into becoming a mother. It is the physical, emotional, psychological, hormonal and social shifts 
that occur during this time.

It’s a shift in identity. Much like adolescence is the transition from child to woman, Matrescence is the transition from woman to mother. And just like adolescence, it can feel messy, intense, uncertain and deeply transformative.

It’s the reshaping of a woman in every sense through the process of becoming a mother. How she feels in her body, how she thinks, how she relates to others, what she values, and how she sees herself in the world.

It’s gradual and deeply personal. And while parts of it can feel overwhelming, there’s also growth and strength to be gained from this reshaping that deserves to be acknowledged, supported and spoken about.

Why is it important to acknowledge this period of time.

 

Because when we name it, we give it validity. When we acknowledge it, women feel seen in an experience that can otherwise feel isolating and it helps shift the narrative from “what’s wrong with me?” to “this is a normal, significant transition.”

 

What are some of the major shifts / changes a mum can experience with Matrescence but may not recognise or understand?

Research shows that during pregnancy and after birth, the maternal brain undergoes structural and functional changes, to support bonding, heightened sensitivity to infant cues, and protective behaviours. With this can also come hypervigilance, brain fog, mood changes, and a sense that your capacity or ability to do what you once did just isn’t quite there.

We’ve grown and given birth (however that may look) to a human being. Our bodies have stretched, changed and worked in incredible ways. Many women may feel depleted nutritionally and energetically, some may have navigated more complex pregnancies or births. We are recovering physically, trying to get to know our new little babies, navigating feeding journeys and experiencing one of the biggest drops in hormones our bodies will ever experience in our lifetime. 

Our hearts expand in ways we didn’t expect. Alongside deep love can come worry, self-doubt and uncertainty. There can also be grief - a quiet letting go of who we were before while still not fully knowing who we are becoming.

That in-between space can feel vulnerable.

Life doesn’t look the same. We can’t always be or do what we once did, and it can feel hard to show up as the “old you.” We carry a new awareness…. We’re giving so much of ourselves, our time, attention and bodies and that can shift relationships, priorities and how we see ourselves.

If we can understand this process and recognise that it serves a purpose, we may be able to soften into it a little more, rather than feeling like something is wrong with us.

 

 The First 5 days + The First 5 Months

Birth and recovery aren’t linear, and they’re not confined to just “6 weeks”, it’s a much longer process that continues to shift and evolve over time.

You know that saying… you walk into your 6-week check, get the tick of approval, and off you go living life like you never had a baby? To me, that assumes we’re all the same, that we recover, heal and function like robots, without acknowledging the nuances that matrescence brings.

Clinically, the immediate postpartum period is defined as 6 weeks, the “fourth trimester” extends to around 3 months, and matrescence can continue for years.

My Favorite quote is “the body whispers before it screams”. There is so much noise postpartum - internally and externally. Listening to your body and allowing time for recovery isn’t a luxury, it’s essential.

Your body is doing enormous things. Go gently. Go kindly

 

What To Expect The First 5 Days After Giving Birth 

Day 0-1 : 

There can be this incredible “high” in those first 24 hours, adrenaline, excitement, sometimes even euphoria while at the same time the body feels tender. Bleeding is at its heaviest, the uterus is actively contracting back down, there may be wounds or stitches to care for, and you’re often establishing feeding for the very first time. It can feel surreal, overwhelming and at the same time completely elating.

Day 2-3 :

Hormones really start to shift here, oestrogen and progesterone drop rapidly, and it’s one of the biggest hormonal changes your body will go through. Milk is coming in, breasts can feel full, heavy, sometimes engorged, babies are often cluster feeding to help establish supply, visitors are rife.

Emotionally, this is when things can feel more overwhelming. You might find yourself laughing and crying in the same breath. This is typically when the “baby blues” can hit, tears, exhaustion, information overload and self-doubt can creep in.

It can feel like something isn’t working like you or your baby are broken, when in reality, everything is usually normal… it’s just a lot.

Day 4-5 :

This can look different for everyone, some are finding their feet and gaining confidence, for others the wheels may be falling off. Generally speaking, milk is in, feeding is somewhat established, sleep intermittent, pain is improving and bleeding is reducing. Any afterbirth pains should have gone by now. We are generally home in our own beds or on our way at this stage.

 Tips for recovery:

   Rest and skin-to-skin where you can

     Nourishing, warm meals eaten regularly

    Stay on top of pain relief

  Feeding positions that support healing and comfort

  Empty your bladder regularly

 Consider a gentle laxative to keep bowels soft and moving

   Accept help — don’t try to do it all

  Gentle mobilisation, balanced with plenty of rest

 Comfortable clothing and supportive underwear

 Ice or heat packs as needed

 Keep yourself warm (warm socks go a long way)

   Follow up with a women’s health physio

    Lean into your village — support is everything

 

What to eat to focus on body repair:

 

  Warm, nourishing meals (think easy to digest, comforting foods)

 Protein at each meal to support tissue repair (eggs, meat, legumes, dairy)
1.7-1.9gms protein per kg of body weight for a lactating woman.

   Iron-rich foods to replenish stores (red meat, leafy greens, lentils)

  Healthy fats for hormones and healing (avocado, nuts, seeds, olive oil)

  Complex carbohydrates for sustained energy (rice, oats, whole grains)

Plenty of fluids — water, broths, herbal teas

 Snack regularly — don’t go long periods without eating

Easy, ready-to-grab foods (especially in those early days)

Continue prenatal vitamins if recommended

 Warm drinks and meals to support circulation and overall recovery

 

What you and your newborn actually need

Honestly, this will vary depending on your needs, but keep it simple.

A safe place for baby to sleep, a few wraps, comfortable and easy clothing and,
nappies for both of you.

That’s your basics.

Good food prep and support people you trust around you. Prioritise people over things. Eg. IBCLC, postpartum doula, family, psychologist, a good GP. Most items can be bought when you realise you need them, but building your support network takes time and is much harder to do when you’re already in it.

Set that up in preparation, not in crisis.

 

The First 5 Months, and beyond
 

This stage is still very much Matrescence, you’re still figuring out your new normal. 

The early intensity may have shifted, but you’re often still sleep deprived, still adjusting, and still finding your feet. For many, the village starts to quieten down a little, partners may be back at work, and the reality of day-to-day motherhood can feel quite isolating at times. It’s a period that can feel unexpectedly lonely and one we don’t talk about enough.

By a few months in, there’s often an expectation that you should feel “back to normal,” but the body is still very much recovering.

Around 3–4 months postpartum, many women notice
postpartum hair loss as hormones stabilise.

Pelvic floor and core strength are still rebuilding, energy can dip, and things like joint laxity, breast changes, or ongoing bleeding/period return can show up.

It’s a slow, layered recovery not a quick bounce back and for many
women, this can be challenging because society says lets get into it.

 

Further hormone changes

 

Hormones don’t just settle after those early weeks; they continue to ebb and flow. If you’re breastfeeding, prolactin remains elevated, often keeping oestrogen lower, which can impact mood, libido, vaginal dryness, and energy. As feeds space out, solids start, or weaning begins, hormones shift again. For some, the return of their period brings another adjustment. It can feel like a moving target, just as you find your feet, things change again.

 

 

Guest Writer: Clare Keys from The Womb Rooms

 

 

Image: Pinterest Emma Dettre